Recently, I’ve lost sight of my true purpose behind doing this. During this hectic time that is lacrosse season, I’ve allowed myself to get caught up in the raising money side of things. And while the money is certainly important, even more important to me is being consistent in my messages and helping increase the awareness that mental health struggles and suicide, especially in men and teens, are at alarmingly high levels.
After about a 2.5 year hiatus, I’ve begun seeing a therapist again, and I’ve really been enjoying my sessions because he really pushes me to think about difficult questions. He also does his best to not share what his thoughts are so that I can come to conclusions on my own. Most recently, in regards to teaching and coaching, he posed the questions “What do you get out of teaching/coaching?” and “Why does it matter to you if your students/players succeed?”
I’ll be honest, I’ve had to think about those questions a little more that I feel like I should. I’m either trying to be very intentional with my answers, or I’m scared of saying the wrong thing, a theme that has come up a lot in our discussions. Am I reading too much into it? Have the frustrations of the seemingly more and more immature students gotten to me over the last 2 years versus the first 2? Have students always been like this and coming into this career during Covid didn’t allow me a true test of the waters?
Whatever the reason for not being able to answer those questions clearly me be, there is one thing I’m sure of. You will be hearing more from me as I continue to train for the Berlin marathon, where I will be representing Movember with a charity bib. I know that in being consistent and sharing my training and personal life updates I can continue to build a following and reach the goals I’ve set in front of me.
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